bad April memories.....

Oklahoma City

Outside of the uncanny tendency over the last four generations for males with our surname to pass away during this time in April......I credit it to tax day........there is another reason why this month brings unfortunate memories for me and to the national psyche.

1993 - the siege at Waco, 1995 - the federal building bombing in Oklahoma City, and 1999 - the Columbine shootings. I remember very clearly where I was at each one of these moments creating our national history. I remember watching news streams come in from Waco, from Oklahoma City, and remember hearing the unthinkable over the radio from Columbine. All of a sudden my generation-having escaped the grief of MLK and JFK, had to cope with the knowledge that in our own country, we were no longer safe. And we saw physical evidence of this as barricades and bollards were quickly installed around courthouses throughout our state.

I can't comprehend why these things happen. I cannot understand why hate builds to the point that innocent people must die because of misdirected feelings of anger and insecurity. I can't understand why I can't walk up to the front doors of our old historic courthouse and walk in the way generations of community folk did-not being redirected to a side door with metal detectors and guards.

When our family drove route 66, we took time to pay homage to the Oklahoma City, Murrah Federal Building site. The memorial was tastefully done for a very spiritual, reflective experience. Of highest note was the Survivor Tree.....the old elm that survived the blast and was incorporated into the memorial. When we visited in 2003, September 11th was already a memory. It was hard for me to ponder the rationale for the way I felt about Oklahoma City, with the total loss of feeling for 9/11 still fresh in my mind.

Do you think we'll ever return to an age of innocence?